A proper name is never purely idividual.
If we wanted to pause for a moment on this significant
fact, we would have to note once again a
paradox or a contradiction: this right to hospitality
offered to a foreigner "as a family," represented and
protected by his or her family name, is at once what
makes hospitality possible, or the hospitable relationship to the foreigner possible, but by the same
token that limits and prohibits it. Because hospitality, in this situation, is not offered to an anonymous
new arrival and someone who has neither
name, nor patronym, nor family, nor social status,
and who is therefore treated not as a foreigner but as
another barbarian. We have alluded to this: the difference,
one of the subtle and sometimes ungraspable
differences between the foreigner and the absolute
other is that the latter cannot have a name or
a family name; the absolute or unconditional hospitality
I would like to offer him or her presupposes
a break with hospitality in the ordinary sense, with
conditional hospitality, with the right to or pact of
hospitality. In saying this, once more, we are taking
account of an irreducible pervertibility. The law of
hospitality, the express law that governs the general
concept of hospitality, appears as a paradoxical law,
pervertible or perverting. It seems to dictate that
absolute hospitality should break with the law of
hospitality as right or duty, with the "pact" of hospitality.
To put it in different terms, absolute hospitality
requires that I open up my home and that I
give not only to the foreigner (provided with a family
name, with the social status of being a foreigner,
etc.), but to the absolute, unknown, anonymous
other, and that I
give place to them, that I let them
come, that I let them arrive, and take place in the
place I offer them, without asking of them either
reciprocity (entering into a pact) or even their
names. The law of absolute hospitality commands a break with hospitality by right, with law or justice as
rights.
Jacques Derrida, Of Hospitality (Stanford University Press, 2000) pp. 23-25